Dear Future Boyfriend: Hurry

For someone who has different circles of friends, I'd only confide in one or two people within a certain group. But I'd always have that part of me who secretly hates doing that. My friends are great and they give the best advice. However, I feel like I'm either just bugging them or I'm always in the wrong, always the one at fault, whatever situation it may be. There are rare times when I'd wish I have a special someone who would tell me, without hesitation, that I'm wrong and that I need to change. Because, well, I can be hard headed and I'm a kid in that way—I need to be told. That feeling resulted to this letter. 

This was when I was younger. I admit I can still be hard headed sometimes. But what never changed is the feeling of wanting to find the one.

11:28 PM 

April 18, 2013

Dear Future Boyfriend,

The first time I wrote to you was almost two years ago. I stopped until the third one. I didn't forget about love, don't worry. It's just that I got busy with different things.

I said in my first letter that I don't expect to meet you soon. But I'm changing my mind, I really want to meet you already. I feel sad that my friends' love lives are unfolding in front of me while I'm stuck in the bleachers watching them be happy in their field. Sometimes, I think the longer it takes, the bigger the problem there is with me. Do you really like thin girls? Do I really have to lose weight to meet you? Can't you just find me and you'll just help me lose weight instead? 

Sometimes it saddens me that my phone isn't ringing constantly with text messages from someone. Or phone calls to check up on me. I want that. I want someone to go home with me especially during days I lack sleep, so I can lay my head on your shoulder during commutes or you can watch me sleep in between traffic if ever you have a car.

But what you have doesn't really matter, it's what you feel. :)

Love,

Your Future Girlfriend